This last week I retold the story of New Community. I have to admit it was a strangely emotional experience. It kind of blind-sided me. It is really a story about how I flubbed it up continually and how God was full of grace toward our community. When I got home after the service I collapsed on the couch and slept for a good long time. I went to bed early and got up feeling like I had been on a "bender."
I rarely "honk" my stuff, but if you care to listen to the talk it can be found at
1956 - Swedish Christian statesman Dag Hammarskjald recorded in
his devotional journal (Markings): 'Bless your uneasiness as a sign that there
is still life in you.'
1534 - The Society of Jesus (Jesuits) was founded by Ignatius of
Loyola, 43. Created to foster reform within Catholicism, and to undertake
education and missionary work, this colorful religious order was formally
approved by Pope Paul III in 1540.
1968 - Presbyterian apologist Francis Schaeffer wrote in a letter:
'We live in an abnormal world and all kinds of things do exist, but this does
not make them right.'
I just got back from Europe and it
is worse than I imagined. I knew the
dollar was getting “beaten down” but not to this degree
. The Euro is not only substantially more
valuable than the dollar than the last time I was here, but also it seems that
the 1 Euro buys less. When I have traveled to Europe in the past I expected the
exchange rate to suck for me, but I calculated in my mind that that once I
exchanged my weak dollar I could at least think about purchases about the same
way I think here. Like if a McDonald’s
breakfast (which I consume a ridiculous amount of) for five dollars in the
states, after I exchanged I could at least use the same five dollar standard,
only with Euro. The double whammy now is
the same Mickie D’s meal is like 6 or 7 Euro. I felt like yelling at the person at the counter, “Are you joking
me! This is friggin McDonalds! I am contacting the Kroch family!” That translates to about a 9 dollar McDonalds
breakfast. Crazy! I am boycotting.
Another troubling exchange rate
that I discovered on this trip which has caused a great deal of internal
processing is how personal and experiential currencies are exchanged from one organization
to another. As I enter this new job with Christian Associates, I have realized
that in many ways what I have accomplished in the last 24 years of pastoring,
catalyzing and learning does not translate directly over. In fact it seems like it might be a detriment
in some ways. It is not like the dollars
of my life are worthless, but it is as if much of their value is diminished in the
exchange.
This has been troubling primarily
because of some weird internal feeling of entitlement I have. Like, I have earned certain respect,
privilege, etc. It is obviously prideful
on many levels, but difficult nonetheless. Pride is funny like that. If it
were an easy adversary, then I would have been a conquering victor years
ago. I have had years of battles. I usually get my ass kicked and find myself
in confession/repentance cycles. I am quicker
to recognize it, but the battle is still real.
I think it was Nouwen who spoke
about his transition from academia to L’Arche (a community for the disabled)
and having the realization of coming to a community that could care less about
what he had done, taught, written and been recognized for up to that point and
how that led to an awareness that his life and identity were seriously and
disablingly wrapped up in what he did
rather who he was as the beloved of
God.
Lesson to learn (again – dang it):
I need to accrue a new cache of currency in my new role. Entitlement must be pushed back, and humility
must be in front (…and everyone knows how good I am at humility).
1948 - English apologist C.S. Lewis wrote in a letter: 'We ought
to give thanks for all fortune: if it is good, because it is good; if bad,
because it works in us patience, humility, contempt of this world and the hope
of our eternal country.'
1765 - English founder of Methodism John Wesley wrote in a letter:
'You have but one Pattern; follow Him inwardly and outwardly. If other
believers will go step for step with you, well; but if not, follow Him!'
Homer/fagles: Illiad I'm actually reading the Illiad. Felt like if I didn't read it sometime before I die I'd be a chump. I'm admittedly not much into fiction. I usually watch mine. (**)
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